Minki bullies men online and they pay her for it. One guy borrowed $25K to give her

On the Gold Coast, ‘Minki’ is counting some cash after being sent a code to pick it up at an ATM.

Behind her, two young boys on bikes see her counting the money she’s just collected. It’s a thousand dollars, in fifties, so it’s hard to miss.

“Flex that cash girl,” one of them yells. And she does.

Sitting in the driver’s seat of her car, she fans the cash over her face while recording a video message for the person who sent it to her.

“What a good little pay piggy. You got out a thousand dollars instead of 500. I wonder what I’m going to spend this on,” the 23-year-old psychology student replies.

“I can’t wait to just lay around while you go to work all day to give me money.”

The recipient of her message is elated—more than elated—and after a few minutes to himself, he tells her he will enjoy this interaction later tonight by himself.

Minki (the name she uses online) has never met him and never will.

Her little “pay piggy” is into financial domination — a kink where someone (usually a man) finds pleasure in financially submitting to someone else.

In this relationship, there is a dominant — the one who receives money and gifts — and a submissive – the one who willingly and consensually serves them financially.

“The sexual part of the kink actually takes place after there would be an exchange of a call or messaging or a video call,” Minki explains.

“They will go and have some fun with the memory of what we’ve done.”

Financial domination — sometimes findom — became more popular when the sex industry pivoted more online during the pandemic, psychologist Dr Sarah Ashton from SHIPS (Sexual Health and Intimacy Psychological Services) told The Feed.

Now, some people on social media are selling it as a quick way to make money online for doing “very little”.

Allowances, loans and blackmail

Minki is a financial dominatrix. The Australian man who just sent her a thousand dollars is one of many who regularly send her money. She doesn’t share specifics about her income, but says she makes five figures a week from findom — and spend hours each day online.

Minki, who is also an adult content creator on OnlyFans, was first asked if she did findom two years ago.

A girl driving in a car, a girl counting cash, a girl sitting in her car showing off her money.

Minki responds to a financial submissive after a cardless cash meet where he sends her a bank code to pick up money. Source: SBS

“I jumped on it and I was like, yes, yes, I do this,” she said, fibbing about having done it before but willing to try.

Most times, these relationships are purely online, and a financial dominant is not required to do, say or send anything sexual in return.

The only time it ever crosses into the real world is if a submissive — who sometimes goes by the name pay pig or cash slave — organises a “cash meet”. As it sounds — a submissive will meet in person to physically hand over the money.

A woman talking into a mobile phone while standing behind a white car

Some of Minki’s financial submissives have been giving her money and gifts for years. She’s never met any of them. Source: SBS

“Everyone likes different parts of this kink,” says Minki. “Some guys get off on the bullying and the degrading.”

Minki’s common insults include: “you’re fat,” “you’re ugly”, and “it’s so small, that’s so embarrassing”.

Bullying and degradation can be momentary (in the form of a voice message) or it can span for hours in something called a “draining” session. In these sessions, men can send $50 to hundreds of dollars.

Beforehand, dominants and submissives set a cost and time frame, and they will be degraded until they reach the agreed amount.

A woman chats to her hairdresser while getting her hair done.

Minki says some men like to see her living lavishly — and send her money to get her hair and nails done. Source: SBS

Those who aren’t so keen on insults may instead like to see her living lavishly, giving her a budget to spend on certain things (such as pedicures in a colour of their choosing, designer bags or a haircut).

“Some guys get off on the struggling to pay me back,” Minki adds.

This, she hopes, is more fantasy than real life. Her favourite submissive, she says, took out a $25,000 loan because he liked the idea of making repayments to a dominant.

“He was like, ‘oh, it’s a fantasy of mine to get out a loan … And I was like, ‘Okay, I can work with that,'” Minki says.

Minki says the “bratty” character she leans into, and her appearance are probably why people come to her.

Some guys get off on the struggling to pay me back.

Minki, 23

“I think a big part of that is just being another hot girl on Instagram,” she said.

Currently, Minki has access to about ten bank accounts. With some of her submissives, they set an allowance. From their income, they will get a sum, and Minki will take the rest.

Why money? Well, it actually makes a lot of sense

Giving away hard-earned money might seem illogical, misguided, foolish — take your pick. But to psychologist Sarah Ashton it’s not all that surprising.

“Money represents power on so many levels,” she said. “Think about what it gives someone in their life, what freedoms, what responsibilities, and think about how much of our world is driven by money.”

And with money linked to masculinity, she says that may be where the fetish comes from for some.

“If a man has grown up and he feels that earning and providing money is really connected to masculinity, however in the context of his relationships, that’s not something that he’s able to express, then perhaps this is an avenue for feeling a sense of power,” she said.

Dr Sarah Ashton, a psychologist specialising in sexual health, says interest in financial domination may come from the link between masculinity and the idea of “providing”. Source: SBS

And the opposite goes, too.

“If you are someone who’s in control, looks after everyone else, sometimes it can feel really cathartic, healing and arousing to be in a completely submissive position.”

A kink sold as a ‘side hustle’

In texts to The Feed, some Australians shared why they’re attracted to financial domination.

“It makes me feel weak and pathetic, and I get off on that feeling,” one 25-year-old man from Brisbane who works in hospitality said.

“It just feels so right! I guess it’s the thrill of sacrificing and sending money to make my Goddess happy.”

One financial submissive told The Feed say the euphoria also comes in the risk. But sometimes it’s backfired with some people scamming them online and impersonating other dominatrix’s. Source: SBS

Kurt, who is from Amsterdam, has watched financial domination evolve from a niche to a more popular kink over the past 15 years. For 10 of those years, not only was he a financial submissive, but he was addicted to it.

“It’s (like) temporarily not existing … very similar to how most people would describe any drug, it’s just to escape,” he said.

“It had gotten to the point where I had multiple loans, credit card debt, behind on phone bills, behind on all bills and basically (I was) declared bankrupt.”

Kurt understands that others can have healthier relationships with findom, but he says the boom in popularity has exposed how tricky it can be to set boundaries.

A man's face on a laptop screen during a video call

Kurt, 44, was declared bankrupt and his relationship fell apart because of his addiction to financial domination. Source: SBS

“There are good doms, then there are people in it purely for the money,” he said. Some doms are selling online “financial domination” as videos, and not as one-on-one relationships, making it hard to check in with people who might be struggling, he said.

Some aren’t doing aftercare (debriefs after intense sessions), submissives are getting scammed by people who aren’t dominants at all and, some submissives expect dominants to always be online and available.

“The most worrying [trend] for me is that addiction itself has become a fetish,” he said.

Kurt now runs a financial domination addicts support group. More than 60 men have passed through his weekly meetings where he coaches them on recovery.

“There are some recovery groups online which are very easy to join. Such groups are very vulnerable to be targeted,” he said.

“It is interesting to a dominant to manipulate the person who’s trying to recover and have them obstruct other people’s recovery.”

‘Next person is going to get in anyway’

Taylor Wright, who lives on the NSW Central Coast and is dabbling in financial domination, says she has occasionally turned away men with families and one submissive who told her he was homeless.

“I’ve never want to ruin people’s lives by doing this activity. But at the end of the day there comes a line where someone makes their own choices,” she said.

“If it doesn’t involve anybody else and you’re just going to do said thing anyway, then yeah, I’ll take your f—king money. What’s the point? The next person’s going to get it anyways.”

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